Taylor Swift is so right about you.
smell my finger.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
