Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
Randomize
