Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
