From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize