my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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