The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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