If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
