is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
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