i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
i already hear my dad disowning me
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Randomize