READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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