I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
