My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
Randomize
