We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
