oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Randomize
