He is such a slut. More and more my type.
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
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