just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Randomize
