the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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