Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
he high fived his dick after we had sex
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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