We're facebook friends in real life
Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
Randomize
