dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
they're like a gay fantastic four
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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