Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Randomize
