K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Randomize
