I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
i out mim tonsoeep
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