when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
