She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
You did what with his pubic hair?
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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