My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
