How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
Randomize
