Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
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