have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
