good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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