Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
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