Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Randomize
