I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize