Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
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