Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
