went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
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