There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Randomize
