She is in my trunk
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Randomize
