butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
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