He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
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