The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
