How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
Randomize