We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
