escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
Still dying that you shit outside
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
