the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Randomize
