those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
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