no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Randomize
