What did we do last night that was yellow?
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
