I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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