just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Randomize
