honey bunches of taint.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
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